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Personal Bodyguard
I am daddy’s personal bodyguard. As I mentioned in my previous BLOG, I am a buff muscle woman. That means I am the perfect candidate to protect daddy when he is inside the house. Wherever daddy goes, I go. Daddy has my undivided bodyguard protection no matter where he is inside the house. Not to mention, I have a bloodhound-like nose. If someone tries to hurt daddy, I can sniff him/her out from miles away...
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Acting like a boy
I lift up my right back leg, trying to balance myself with my other three feet. Just two inches above the ground, I lose my balance and put my feet down. I don’t get it, isn’t Mac (Grandma Louis’s dog) a dog like me? I seem to remember him lifting up his back leg when he pees. I look at my back legs: they are full of muscle. “I can do this, “ I tell myself. Of course I can, I am a muscle woman who is strong enough to do anything....
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The Red Crocodile
The red crocodile is swimming in the green sea. It swims out from the garage making a loud noise as it crawls into the grassy area. It drinks the grass and spits out the remains as it swims through the backyard. I bark at the red crocodile. It returns its madness by blowing air along with grass in my face. I back up, clench my teeth, raise my lip and show the red crocodile my strong teeth and jaw.
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Call me the Shredder
Call me The Shredder. Every day when daddy goes to work, I start searching the garage. My glorious shredder list is growing by the day. The water hose was my first victim. Mommy used it to give me a shower within the first two weeks of my arrival at daddy’s house. Well, I HATED IT. I hated the shower and I hated the water hose that splashed out endless water. I took my anger out on the water hose the next day when daddy went to work. It was a great pleasure to shred the water hose into tiny little pieces and disguised them in the long grass....
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Meal Time
“ Food. I need food,” my stomach growls, waking me up. “Food. Give me food,” it continues to complain loudly. I lift my heavy eyelid that is reluctant to open glance through the window. The sun has been out, but daddy is still deeply asleep in bed. I crawl out from under the blanket, shake my head to chase away the sleepy bugs and walk up to the side of daddy’s bed.
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Fire Angel
I hate cold. Period. I hate cold especially in winter when daddy puts me in the icy garage when he is going to work. The “cold” evil spirit attacks me from every direction. I mean, I do have a fuzzy bed that daddy got me to keep me warm, but it is just not enough. Even though I am unable to see the cold evil spirit, I can feel its hand brushing through my fur even when I am lying on my warm furry bed. Why can’t daddy buy me the sun and hang it in the garage? I ask daddy everyday when he is leaving for work.
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Works of Art
The carpet is my painting “floor”. Every morning, while daddy and mommy are busying getting ready to work, I flip to my back and start my artwork of the day. I wiggle my back on the carpet to create different images using the dirt that was left on my body from playing in the backyard the day before. My works of art are like Picasso’s. No one can really make out what I am actually drawing, but they are as beautiful as the striking yellow grass field that I run around in when daddy takes me for a walk. I am a very talented artist.
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Doggie Vacuum Machine
I am a doggie vacuum machine. My job is to pick up any food that drops on the floor in the house. At this moment, I am waiting like a hawk, watching daddy and mommy move around in the kitchen. Once something drops, I dive in, shape my mouth into an O shape, and suck in the food before anyone can pick it up. I am proud to tell you that I don’t miss a thing that drops on the floor. After I suck in the food, I go back to my waiting position again, waiting for my next chance to taste the tasty human food....
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The Neighbor Dog
“Hey, hey, come here. Come and play with me,” the neighbor dog barks me down (aka “waving down” in human terms) when I am out in the backyard. I move closer to the fence and peak through the crack. The first thing I notice is the nasty poop smell coming from the other side of the fence. I take a closer look. There are piles of poop all over the ground and the neighbor dog’s feet. I inhale deeply and take a few steps back. Before I can make up my mind about what I want to do, the neighbor dog starts barking again.
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Daddy's Little Girl
I like to whine. Why do I like to whine? Because I always get what I want when I whine. For instance, in the morning when I wake up, I sit right by daddy’s bed and start whining into his ear. Soon enough, daddy will get up and let me out to go potty. To tell you the truth, I don’t really have to go. I can still hold it for another hour or so, but because I am up, of course everyone else has to get up with me. I also whine in the morning when I am not ready to get up. I hate it when daddy lets the alarm go on and on without turning it off. The annoying noise also disturbs my sweet dreams.....
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I Love Bitter Apple
Hey, can you keep a secret? I am going to tell you something I love to do every day, but don’t tell my daddy. So are you ready for my secret? I LOVE HOW BITTER APPLE SMELLS AND TASTES. Every morning daddy sprays bitter apple on my bandage. Right when he steps out the front door, I cannot wait to start chewing the bitter apple spray on my bandage. Because of that, I have even developed a yoga move so I can chew my bandage with the dish around my head......
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The American Bulldog Introduction
My name is Daisy . I turned 1 year old on December 10, 2009. My daddy always says I am a petite little flower. However, I am not so sure why he always calls me that since I look more like a muscle woman . I am an American bulldog mix. Many people mistake me for a pit bull.
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